From Private Eye: astonishing new plan to save Europe

Astonishing new secret plan to save Europe

Stock markets soared yesterday and bankers downed champagne openly in the streets when Chancellor Merkel and President Sarkozy announced that they had come up with a “miraculous new plan” to save the Eurozone, the European banking system and the entire world economy from meltdown.  At a joint press conference, the two EU leaders told newsmen that although their plan is “ the answer to all Europe’s problems”, they cannot reveal any of details yet.  “It would be premature” they said “ to tell anyone precisely what we have in mind, but rest assured that once everyone sees what we are proposing, they will realise we have got the whole mess totally licked – Greek debt, the future of the euro, and above all, how to prevent a collapse of the French and German banking systems.”  Although the details are to be kept under wraps until November, insiders last night were predicting that the essence of the plan is that the European Central Bank should be allowed to  print 100 trillion euros, which will then be donated to the French and German banks to save them from bankruptcy.  “Soon, said one overjoyed banker, “we shall be able to spend, spend, spend like there is no tomorrow – but which, for Greece, unfortunately, is already the case.”


One Response to “From Private Eye: astonishing new plan to save Europe”

  1. paulxx Says:

    It must be a very cunning plan, I can’t wait!

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